


Christmas Party Coworker Trap

by scarlettblythe



Category: The Mindy Project
Genre: TMP Secret Santa Fic Exchange 2014, i have no idea what this even counts as
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-24
Updated: 2015-02-17
Packaged: 2018-03-03 05:04:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2839073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarlettblythe/pseuds/scarlettblythe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alittlenutjob's prompt: Beverly’s son visits at Christmas, Any genre, any characters, any setting, AU always welcome.</p><p>Well, it certainly turned out all of those things. In honour of Christianity's baby god being born and stuff (congrats, guys!), I give you this... thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [alittlenutjob](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlenutjob/gifts).



> It got away from me and is now 3 chapters of thing. 2nd chapter I'm editing right now, 3rd is drafted. Consider it an apology because I KNOW this is not where you saw this prompt going. Not even a little bit.

“And that is why I should be allowed to plan this year’s Christmas Party.” Mindy clicked the remote in her hand and the PowerPoint slide changed to her favourite picture of herself, superimposed in front of a giant Christmas tree decorated with all her coworkers’ smiling faces. It was… not the best image, but it was festive, and she was counting on Dr. Shulman’s eyesight not being great.

 

Shulman leaned forward on the desk, palms together, fingers tapping his lips.

“Interesting proposal, Dr. Lahiri. But as you know, we decided not to have holiday parties anymore after last year’s… unfortunate incident.”

 

“Okay, that guy got what was coming to him.” The rough voice of one Daniel Castellano cut across the room, tinged with its customary blend of irritation and force. “That Nativity was given to me by my mom, and no _elf_ is going to sexualise the Virgin Mary that way, okay? She’s the _Virgin Mary_.” Danny’s voiced strained to a whisper for the last two words, and Mindy rolled her eyes. She drifted off before he could get too deep into his rant.

This Christmas party _had_ to happen.

 

She’d only been working at Shulman and Associates a few months, and it had been a rocky beginning. Danny still hadn’t forgiven her for whatever she’d done to piss him off during their residency, Jeremy was constantly hitting on her - though that wasn’t that bad, actually - and Shulman seemed to regard her as his loveable but useless daughter, there to be coddled but otherwise ignored. She needed their respect, and this party was how she was going to get it. It was her Christmas Party Coworker Trap, and it _had to work_. It was time to lay down the law.

 

“Okay, look, Dr. Shulman. I appreciate that Dr. Castellano is like, unfit to be allowed out in public,” Mindy began, ignoring Danny’s angry interjection, “But I am sure he has matured since the, um, Elf Incident. Right, Danny?” Mindy’s voice was beseeching, but she knew better than to let him respond, especially when his eyebrows were doing that thing where they almost connected, his scowl was so deep. “And we will put the Nativity in a glass case this year.”

 

Danny leaned back in his chair, arms crossed. He wasn’t shouting, and his eyebrows were a normal distance from each other - for Danny. One down. She took a deep breath, and moved on.

 

“And Jeremy was telling me just last week that the nurses were complaining about the lack of festive cheer, weren’t you Jeremy?” She left out the part about the nurses wanting to kiss him under the mistletoe, but from the lascivious smile spreading across his face, it was more than enough of a reminder. Two down.

 

“And after all, Dr. Shulman, you wouldn’t want them to -” she cleared her throat delicately, dropping her voice to a stage whisper, “ _unionise_.”

 

She crossed her fingers behind her back and waited for her magic word to take effect. There. A wince. She had him.

 

“Alright, Dr. Lahiri. You have your Christmas party.”

 

“Really?” Mindy couldn’t suppress a squeal. “Yes! This party is going to be the best night _some_ of you have ever had.” She glanced over her shoulder at Danny, throwing him her sweetest smile. He snorted, not meeting her eyes.

 

She didn’t care. She had her party, and now all she had to do was make it _the_ social event for the Upper West Side’s medical community. And she knew just the person to call.

 

*****

 

Channington Alvarez entered the office the next day with an expression that said he was doubting he had the right address. He halted at the reception desk, where Danny was rifling through patient files. Mr. Alvarez pulled off his scarf, clearing his throat loudly and tapping on the desk to get Danny’s attention. The scowl was etched into Danny’s face before he even met the other man’s eyes.

“You’re not a patient.”

“You are not a goat.”

“Excuse me?”

“I thought we were exchanging obvious information. Are we done? May I assume you are not Dr. Mindy Lahiri?”

“Figures,” Danny muttered under his breath. He stood up, the chair spinning backwards with enough force to make his frustration evident. He walked over to Mindy’s office, rapping on her door and tossing it open before she could respond.

“Some guy’s here for you. And if you could keep your personal life out of the office, that would be great. Some of us care about the wellbeing of our patients.”

 

Mindy poked her head out of her office, and her face lit up when she saw her guest.

“Mr. Alvarez! It’s so good to finally meet you!” She shook his hand warmly.

“Doubtless. So, is this the space?”

She nodded. “I know it seems modest compared to what you’re used to, but I swear, it has potential. We can even clear out that central area -” she nodded to the space behind the wraparound reception desk “- for food, or a tree, maybe.”

Danny was leaning against his office door, taking in the scene before him.

“Are you kidding me? You’re going to upend the whole office? Who is this guy, anyway?”

Mindy ignored him to beam up at her new friend. “You can use Dr. Castellano’s office, too.”

He was not so content to let Danny’s churlishness slide.

“I am Channington Alvarez, and I am an event co-ordinator the likes of which you have never seen before, elderly man.”

“I’m in my thirties! And just say you’re a party planner, okay? _Event co-ordinator_ ,” Danny mocked under his breath, watching Mindy and Channington turn away from him to discuss the possibilities of the hot pipe room.

“Now, Dr. Lahiri,” said the event co-ordinator, “can we discuss the budget?”

 

The budget she had been given was paltry, really, but this party was worth topping it up out of her holiday bonus. There would be been more, but her eye had been caught by the most amazing dress when she went looking for theme inspiration. Anyway, if her plan was going to work, she had to sparkle as much as the party did, so buying the dress was basically the same as a whole extra tree.

 

As it turned out, Channington knew exactly what the space needed. He pulled a laptop from his immaculate leather satchel, opening it to reveal pages of gorgeous layouts. As Mindy debated the merits of _Ice Garden_ v. _Mumbai meets Manhattan_ , Danny peered over her shoulder.

“No.”

“No what, Danny?”

“We are not having an elephant at our Christmas party.”

Mindy snorted. “It’s not a real elephant, Danny.”

Channington regarded him severely. “The elephant makes a topical political statement. It draws from pop culture, the New York melting pot, and the elusive street artist Banksy to make a cutting statement on cultural appropriation.”

“Yeah, Danny!”

“Cultural appropriation? Isn’t that just stealing stuff from other places? Doesn’t that mean using the elephant at all is cultural whatzigigs?”

Mindy gaped. “Danny! That was like, almost politically correct!”

“Whatever. I’m just saying, it’s a stupid elephant.” He retreated into his office, closing the door soundly.

“Dr. Lahiri, if you’d prefer, I can email these to you. Now, since we’re a little pressed for time, do you think you could have your choice, plus any amendments you’d like to make, organised by close of business tomorrow?”

“Oh, sure! No problem.”

“And, if you wouldn’t mind…?” He raised his eyebrows.

“Oh my god, of course!” Mindy took out her checkbook and scribbled out a check. She tore it out with a flourish and handed it to the event coordinator, an exuberant smile suffusing her face. “I’m so excited!”

He smiled at her paternally. “I’ll speak to you soon.”

 

*****

Three days later, Mindy rushed into the office, panic all over her face.

“Shauna! Shauna. Help me.”

“Sure, Dr. L! What’s up?”

“I think our party planner has been murdered.”

_“What?”_

“I haven’t heard from him in three days. He sent over the theme samples, I picked the most gorgeous one, and then nothing. He didn’t even confirm that he got my email.”

“Dr. L., that doesn’t sound like he got murdered. That sounds like -”

“Don’t say it. Don’t you dare say it.”

“It sounds like someone skipped off with your money and went to Cabo.” Danny was leaning against his office door, arms folded. His smile was two shades from gleeful. Mindy wanted to slap him.

“Why are you always leaning against things, Danny? Do you think your carefully constructed image as the office’s handsome jerk will crumble if you stand up straight?” Mindy collapsed forward onto her hands, wailing. “The party is this weekend! Dr. Shulman is going to _kill_ me.”

 

Beverley popped her head out of phlebotomy, an unlit cigar in her mouth and a urine sample in each hand.

“You know, I can take care of it for ya.”

“I don’t want him dead, Beverley,” Mindy whispered, scandalised. “I just want him to finish planning the party, or failing that for him to give me all my money back, or failing _that_ for him to give me lists of literally everything I need to know to pick stuff up and like… put it places.” She gestured vaguely to the room around her.

Danny shook his head. “Yeah, that’s not going to work. You said you couldn’t push your own chair in last week because your nails were wet.”

“Nails don’t take a week to dry, Danny. Not even this stunning Christmas manicure.” She glared at him when he slapped her fingers away from his nose. “Ow. You shouldn’t hit women, Danny. Honestly, though, what am I going to do?”

 

“I told you, I can fix it.” Beverley put the urine samples on the counter with a little too much force, and Mindy jumped behind Danny, grimacing. Beverley smirked, fishing a box of matches from inside her bra. “I can have the whole thing sorted in less than 24 hours, and all you have to do is go on a date with my son.”

“Okay, she’s not going to do that.” Danny snatched the cigar out of her mouth and tossed it into the trash. It landed in the can across the room with a satisfying thump. Danny glanced back at Mindy, a proud grin on his face, but Mindy’s focus was on Beverley and she was _furious_.

“Are you kidding? Go on a date with your, like, gross alcoholic thief son? He would probably kill me and sell me for organs!” Mindy lunged at Beverley and Danny turned to restrain her.

“I _meant_ because you have too much self-respect to pimp yourself out over some tinsel and a few bottles of wine.” He was gripping her shoulders, eyebrows raised as he stared her down. She slumped in his hold, chastised.

“Right. Yes, that’s better.” Her customary smile flitted back onto her face. She leaned past Danny. “Tell him to call me when he can buy me a Rolex.”

“Mindy, stop that, okay?” Danny was in his irritating ‘take-charge’ mode, gripping her shoulders again. “I’ll take care of this. Alright? I’ll take care of it.”

“What? How are you going to take care of this?” Mindy had a sudden vision of Danny behind a huge wooden desk, surrounded by a halo of smoke. “Oh god, Danny, this isn’t a mob thing, is it? This practice can’t have a mob connection, Danny! We’re only just getting over the scandal from Beverley’s smuggling ring!”

Danny sighed. “I’ll call my brother. He’s got, uh, connections, in the New York... event coordinating scene.”

“Oh my god, you have a brother? And a brother with _connections?_ Is he hot?”

Danny smirked. “What do you think? Castellano curse, huh?” He rubbed the backs of his fingers along his jawline, giving Mindy a half-nod like he thought he was Joey Tribbiani or something. She wrinkled her nose in response.

“Ah, so short, weird body, disgusting feet. Noted.”

“You’ve never seen my feet!”

“Wrong, mister. We all saw them, that day that dog peed on your shoes and you had to change into your spare pair.”

“Fine. Don’t take my help. I’m sure you can fix this just fine without me.” Danny’s crooked grin was back, and so was Mindy’s urge to slap him.

“I can, though. I can fix this, and I don’t need you.” She picked up her handbag and stormed haughtily towards the exit.

“Sure.”

She couldn’t resist. Halting at the glass doors to the lobby, she turned back to face them, tossing her hair imperiously.

“No-one needs you here, Danny Castellano.” With one last hair flick, she stormed out.

 

Danny’s grin disappeared. Something flickered across his face, but was quickly smothered by determination. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed.

“Richie? A friend needs a favour.”

 

*****


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we finally meet Beverley's son. But does he take after his mother? ONLY TIME WILL TELL.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, you know when you reread something you wrote and realise you hate it? And then you spend forever reworking it and trying to make it less awful, but it just gets worse and worse, until finally it's been SO LONG since you posted that you start feeling this immense sense of guilt about THAT, and then you never post it ever even though there's literally no reason not to?
> 
> That is me. I am the worst. So this is an exercise in GETTING SHIT DONE. I hope you enjoy Part 2 of this vaguely ridiculous romp, even if it is now completely seasonally inappropriate.

“Richie, do these balloons have “Exquisite Butts” written on them? You can’t - you can’t bring this kind of stuff in here!”  
“Relax, Danny, they’re just the only silver helium balloons Stevie could get me on short notice. You said she wanted silver, right? Not to mention the check you wrote me was a little smaller than a party this big warranted. But we’re covering them in snowflakes, you won’t even see the... logo.” Richie’s grin was a familiar blend of cocky and knowing, and Danny cursed the genes they had in common.  
“Why is Stevie… I mean what does he have to do with a place like…” Danny nodded at the box of balloons, sweat beading on the back of his neck.  
“I don’t know. I asked him and he just said he had ‘a buddy’ who used to work there who he ‘cleaned up after’. It’s Stevie, you know?” Richie shrugged. “His best jobs are only half legal.”  
“Yeah. Cleanup, huh? Probably bribed everyone who ever saw the guy there or something,” Danny mused, mopping the sweat off the back of his neck.  
“Probably. He’s not a bad guy, Danny.”  
“No. No, he’s not a bad guy.”

“What about the rest of it? Think she’ll like it?” Richie gestured to the large box of decorations. Danny pulled out baubles, silver and frosted white with pops of colour.  
A crooked grin stretched across Danny’s face.  
“Who can tell with her? But uh, yeah, I think so. It’s shiny. She likes shiny, I think. Will there be a tree?”  
“Danny, who are you talking to? Of course there’ll be a tree.”  
“A tree not from the Butt place?”  
“Swear to God.”  
“I take that seriously, you know that.”  
“Yeah, I figured it was serious when you pulled out your checkbook. Moths have built condos in that thing.”  
“Hey, I just don’t spend my money on useless crap, okay?”  
“And Christmas parties aren’t useless anymore?”  
Danny shrugged helplessly. “It’ll be… good for the practice. Like - networking.” He folded his arms, nodding in satisfaction.  
Richie shook his head, grinning. “Right. Whatever. Go work, okay? I’ll handle the rest of the deliveries.”  
“The - rest? How much stuff did you get?”  
“Relax, it’s just the decorations and the tree today. Most of the stuff will come through on the day of. Don't sweat it, Danny.”

**************

Mindy collapsed on a park bench, a hot dog in one hand and a bear claw in the other. She took a bite from the former and chewed introspectively. She’d spent all day chasing Channington Alvarez’s trail. Unfortunately, it turned out watching Miss Congeniality had not been enough preparation for this investigation. She’d been out of ideas since she doorknocked every office at the address on his business card. After the third person laughed at the name “Channington Alvarez” she guessed she wasn’t going to have a lot of luck. Maybe Danny was right - maybe the whole thing had been a scam.

She swallowed the last of her hot dog and started in on the bear claw. The thing is, he couldn’t have been just scamming her. She didn’t just pick him at random - she’d been seeing his name on blogs for months. He did plan parties. Beautiful parties. Just not hers.

Mindy shook off the wave of despondence. She couldn’t just sit here wondering why she wasn’t good enough for some party planner with a stupid name. She had to find the guy. Find him the way she found the credit reports of all the men she dated: the internet.

**************

Danny had managed to put this whole mess of a party out of his head for the entire morning. By lunch, he was almost chipper, heading towards the break room with only the barest of scowls on his face.  
“Oh, awesome, is that the tree?”  
“Richie, why is the tree silver? Trees are green. Pine trees, Richie. When did you last see a silver pine tree?”  
“Okay, try and remember who this party is for. It’s not for you and Ma and all her church friends. It’s for your friend Mindy. Now, do you think Mindy would have anything against a genuine pine tree painted silver?”  
“Wait, there’s an actual tree under there? Doesn’t the paint, like… poison it?”  
“I think chopping it down did it a lot more damage.”  
“Yeah, I guess so,” Danny frowned. “Still, Richie, silver? You don’t think it’s a bit much?”  
Richie shrugged. “There isn’t enough money to go all-out on the decorations. I’m making the tree a statement piece and keeping the rest kind of minimalist. Except for the balloons, of course,” he grinned.  
Danny scowled, then sighed in resignation. “Okay, buddy. I trust you.”  
“I appreciate that, Danny. Okay, where can I store this until the party?”  
“Just put it all in the hot pipe room. Mindy never goes in there anyway, she thinks it’s haunted.”  
Richie dragged the tree around the corner and down the hall to the hot pipe room. He held the door open, shuffling the tree into a corner with his feet as he turned into the room.

Beverley stood, rooted in shock. Richie started, taking in the large sack in at her feet, the fistfuls of medical supplies in each hand.  
“What are you doing?”  
“I’m… reorganising things. This stuff’s expired.”  
“Those syringes have expired?”  
“Yeah. It’s a menace, expired syringes.”  
Richie stepped into the room, letting the door close behind him.  
“Hey, look, I don’t want to be a bad guy. And I know you guys don’t get paid much - my big brother can be a bit of a cheapskate, huh?” He offered her a crooked smile he hoped was charming. “So how about you just put it all back and I won’t tell Danny?”  
Beverley put down the handfuls of supplies, looking chastised.  
“You’re right, Castellano. I was just trying to feed my family, you know? But I’ll just -”  
Richie felt something hit the side of his head, and everything went black.

**************

Mindy walked into the office, chewing a second bear claw despondently. She got halfway across the room when the faintest aroma of balsam hit her. The bear claw hit the ground as she sniffed the air. Yes. It was definitely there. Pine. She looked around the room, and spotted small silver needles scattering the floor. She bent down to pick one up, and realised they weren’t needles at all - or not sewing needles. Someone had brought a silver pine tree into this office.

"Channington?" she called, bear claw falling to the floor. If he'd reappeared, she would kiss him. Just when she was about to start hunting, Danny walked in and spotted her. She was about to greet him, but he saw the pine needles in her hands. A look of sheer panic took over his face, and that was when she knew. Channington wasn't back. This was Danny's doing. He was trying to oust her party plan.

“Danny,” she intoned, her voice controlled but flecked with anger. “Why are there silver pine needles all over the office?”  
“What? There’s not - they’re not - pine needles? Why would there be pine needles?”  
“You’re sweating a _lot_. What are you lying about?”  
“No, I went for a run. I run,” Danny stammered, arms raised, beseeching her to believe him.  
“In your doctor’s coat?”  
Danny looked down at his coat, grasping for an explanation, but Mindy was done with his crap.  
“Yeah, okay. I think it’s pretty obvious what’s going on here.”  
“Look, I’m sorry -”  
“Oh please, you’ve been trying to edge me out of this practice since I started!” Mindy stepped forward, fisting her hands in his shirt, shaking him with surprising ferocity. “And now you get to swoop in, save the Christmas party and be Shulman's hero. Very clever, Danny. I hope you’re proud of yourself, you scheming -”

“What on earth is going on out here? Mindy? Why are you shaking Dr. Castellano?”  
Mindy’s hands tightened their grip on Danny’s shirt. She shot him a look that could peel paint. “Well, I -”  
“I lost one of her patient files. It got mixed in with mine somehow. I could have sworn it was still on my desk, but I must have left it somewhere.” He put his hands on Mindy’s shoulders, eyes wide, begging her to go along with him. She frowned in confusion as he continued. “I’m sorry, Mindy, but I swear it’s around here somewhere. I’ll fix this by the end of the day, okay? Your patient won’t be hurt by this, I swear.”  
“Well, Mindy, it sounds like Dr. Castellano is doing his best. Maybe we don’t need to be quite this loud, then, hmm?” Dr. Shulman returned to his office, and Mindy narrowed her eyes at Danny.

“What are you playing at, Daniel?”  
“Nothing! Look, I just thought, this thing seems to mean a lot to you, and it’s not your fault some scumbag scammed you.”  
Mindy dropped her hands from his chest like Danny had suddenly caught fire.  
“Wait, is this chivalry? Are you being all big-man protector?”  
“Why are you making that sound like a bad thing?”  
“Because I can take care of myself, Danny! God, why don't you get it? You doing this because you think I can’t handle it on my own is just as bad as you trying to edge me out of the practice. Only now you're not trying to push me out because you’re scared of the competition. You’re doing it because you don’t think I’m worth anything.”  
“I didn’t say that!” Danny sighed. “Look, it’s just - I saw a problem, and I knew how to fix it, okay? I wasn’t trying to say anything about you. I just wanted to fix it. And my little brother Richie, he could use the work, you know?” He smiled helplessly, shrugging. “I figured, two birds, one stone.”

Mindy considered this for a moment. “I guess that isn’t the worst idea,” she admitted begrudgingly. “But still, thinking you have to fix things for me? It’s sexist, and it’s gross. You have to ask me if I want help. In light of that, I will not thank you for this. I _will_ thank your little brother, who I’m guessing is like, a young, hot version of you?” Mindy smirked, but Danny just chuckled, amused.  
“Here, I’ll introduce you.” He looked around the office. “Where did he get to, actually? I haven’t seen him in a while.” He frowned. “Richie?” He called, to no response. Spinning around in a circle, bewildered, he turned to the reception staff.  
“Have any of you seen Richie?”  
“No. Oh god, tell me we haven’t lost another party planner.” Mindy was already spinning into panic mode. “Danny, the cops are going to suspect I have something to do with this! Beverley, tell me you can get me out of the country.”  
“I can do better than that.” Beverley took out her phone, smiling like a cat. “I can call my son for you, have him set you up with a nice new identity as his other half. You two will adopt really cute kids.”

“Beverley, for the last time - wait.” Mindy eyed the other woman suspiciously. “Did you have something to do with this?”  
“With what?”  
“What? Beverley, did you disappear Richie?” Danny pushed past Mindy to shout in Beverley’s face. “Did you give my little brother concrete boots? So help me god, I will -”  
“I didn’t kill him! I just… put him somewhere.”  
“At the bottom of the Hudson?”   
“No, just… somewhere you won’t find him until after Dr. Lahiri agrees to go out with my son.”  
“Mindy…” Danny turned to her, eyes pleading.  
“Oh, now you want me to pimp myself out?”  
“My brother’s life could be at stake!”  
“Oh please, she probably just locked him in the hot pipe room.”  
Beverley started backing out of the room. Danny spun back to her, furious.  
“Beverley, did you lock my brother in the hot pipe room?”  
“No…”

Danny bolted past her, down the corridor. They could hear Richie's muffled yells from behind a door with a missing handle. Danny launched himself at the door, hands smacking against it fruitlessly.  
“Richie! Are you okay?”  
“Danny? Yeah, I’m okay. But man, you guys call this the hot pipe room for a reason, huh?”  
“Yeah, I know buddy, I’m sorry. But she didn’t hurt you or anything, did she?”  
“Nah. But she does have me handcuffed to one of the shelves in here - what the hell is your nurse doing with handcuffs, by the way?”  
Beverley shrugged. “I’m old school.”  
“Old school terrifying,” Mindy muttered under her breath.  
Danny ignored them both. “Okay, we’re going to get you out, Richie, alright? Dr. Lahiri is going to go on a date with the nice man and we’re all going home unhandcuffed.”  
Mindy’s mouth dropped open, appalled at the suggestion. “Um, except for the man aiding and abetting blackmail, _Dr. Castellano_. And the blackmailer! This is essentially sexual assault!”  
“What? No! It’s just…”  
“Actually, Danny, it does sound a bit rapey,” Richie intoned through the door.  
“See! The kidnap victim doesn’t even want to be rescued if it means this kind of sacrifice.” Mindy crossed her arms over her chest, eyebrows raised. “What does that tell you, Danny?”  
“Hey, I didn’t say I didn’t want to be rescued!" Richie's hurried response came from inside. "Just - Beverley, is it? Beverley, could we do something else for you?”  
Beverley thought for a moment, tapping another cigar against her teeth.  
“Well, if you won’t go on a date with my son, will you let him fix your party?”

Mindy sighed. “Fine. But my career will not be the one to go down for this. Someone tell Betsy to reprint all the programs with _Party by Dan_ on them.”  
“Excellent. I’ll make a phone call.” Beverley walked back towards the front desk. “Make sure you wear one of those sparkly things. My boy likes sparkles,” she called over her shoulder. Danny had his arms tucked around Mindy’s torso, restraining her, before Beverley had even finished the sentence.

*****

The only solution Mindy could find for this horrible day was to lie on her office floor. One of last season’s slogan tees draped over her face made a decent cold compress, and she was feeling quite zen by the time she heard Shauna’s thick New York accent through her door.  
“Dr L? Beverley’s son is here. He wants to talk to you.”  
“Urgh. Tell him I died.”  
“That would be unfortunate,” came a polished, masculine voice. Her door opened and the voice’s shoes stepped in, a pair of highly polished brogues. Mindy’s eyes dragged up the crisp linen slacks, the classy tie, the pea coat slung over one arm, to a pair of the bluest eyes she’d ever seen.  
“Woah.” She tilted her head. His eyes were actually _twinkling_.   
“See, generally a civil suit doesn’t exist after the complainant expires.”  
“You’re a lawyer.”  
“I am an attorney, yes.”  
“Like a Russian mob lawyer? Or some kind of casino lawyer, who like, breaks peoples’ legs?”  
“Mostly contracts, actually. Lots of torts.”  
“Tortes? You do cake law?”  
He grinned. “I’m Isaac.”  
Mindy’s stomach dropped. She scrambled upright.  
“I did once work with a small bakery in SoHo. Not mob run, as far as I know, though one of the bakers was kind of shifty.”  
Mindy nodded mindlessly, eyes raking over his hair.  
“Anyway, Mom called me because I have a talent for tracking down missing people. Especially when those people go missing with money.” His mother winked at him, and his grin widened. “Apparently there’s someone you need to find.”  
That caught Mindy’s attention. “You can actually help me.”  
“That’s the plan.”  
“You’re Beverley’s son. You look like that -” Mindy waved vaguely at his torso “- and you can _actually_ help me.” She looked past him to where Danny stood, glowering against the reception desk. “Danny, did you finally pray for me?”  
“Trust me, I did not. You can’t pray for what’s happening in your head, Dr. Lahiri. God would smite you just for thinking it.”  
Mindy winked. “Consider me smitten.”  
Danny huffed in disgust. “It’s smote.”  
“Whatever. I don’t have time for your weird grammar lessons right now. We have a party to plan!” Looping one arm through Isaac’s elbow, and the other through Richie’s, she towed them both towards the door. “I’m just so glad you’re both here!”  
“When it’s God, it’s smote,” Danny muttered.  
“I know, Dr. C., murmured Betsy sympathetically. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was Part 2! Part 3 exists but as we all know, that means in practice that I will tear it to shreds, rewrite it seven times, delete it, rewrite it again, set fire to my computer, sob while eating a litre of ice cream, then toss it together in an hour and post it completely unbeta'd. I AM THE WORST.

**Author's Note:**

> I KNOW WE HAVEN'T MET HIM YET. I compared this bloody thing to Waiting for Godot for a (non-wanky) REASON, okay? But he's coming and he should be worth the wait!
> 
> I know, I know. That's what they said about Godot.


End file.
